And for all you who disagree, seriously think about it. When was the last time you saw a “nice guy” date the prettiest girl in school? Or actually lasted in a relationship?
Every girl I’ve ever met says “I’m different, I love nice guys!” But they aren’t different….
I’m sorry I have to respond to this, but I don’t want you to get mixed messages from this. And I apologize if I sound rude at all during this, I have a migraine:
I am currently ranked 6th in my grade in terms of CGPA, I play competitive soccer at my local club and was the leading scorer for my team (which plays at the Division I level within the state), and to be honest, I’ve never looked at a girl that was “out of my league” and wanted to date her. That’s one of the little known benefits of being a demisexual.
So there goes the whole “make yourself look attractive and quit whining” argument.
However, I can’t make assumptions about other guys, and I’m sure you are entirely correct in saying that they are basically chauvinistic pigs, but I was just going off of personal experience. Both sides are at fault, but I’d like to think of myself above that.
Also, the girl that I was writing about “loves” another guy that lives out of state. So it’s not like I’m trying to bitch and moan about all of this. Really, nothing can be done about it, besides maybe driving 700 miles to tell a guy to lay off the girl.
I am her friend first, and a prospective boyfriend second. I do not want to do anything that would jeopardize our friendship, because I respect her and I don’t want to lose her entirely. I value her and our friendship too much for that.
Can we at least agree to meet in the middle and say that both genders contribute to this problem and leave it at that?
I was really responding to the stereotypical “nice guy” mentality that I hear so often. And I did agree that both men and women have superficial tendencies. I’m just tired of being told by supposed nice guys (who actually happen to act super sexist towards women, yet still claim to be nice) that women are the superficial ones.
If you’re one of the actual nice guys, and not the “nice guys” who I was referring to, I’m sorry you’re having trouble with the ladies. I mean, most nice people do have trouble when it comes to love. But more often than not, the real nice guy does come out on top once he finds the right girl. The last man I dated was the real deal, and we were together for almost four years. Our relationship ended because we were at a standstill, but we’re still very great friends. I mean, that’s a big part of growing up. You probably won’t find “the one” in high school. You will date different people until you figure out exactly what it is that you want, and when she comes along you’ll know based off experience.
I know it’s frustrating, but if you are a truly nice guy, and you don’t sink into the bitter, pity party that people with nice guy syndrome throw for themselves, you will be fine.
